Cutting back like normal people

(LighterLife Management – Month 8)

I’m trying something ‘normal’ people do: CUTTING BACK.

One day back in December, or could have been November, I woke up one morning and noticed that my just washed favourite pair of jeans felt way too tight around the waste, producing a bulge that is both uncomfortable and unsightly – the donut.

AND. Here’s the biggie: the first thought to pop into my head was ‘Oh, I need to cut back for a bit’. Now I don’t want to exaggerate and call it a breakthrough, but…. A breakthrough!!!!! I don’t remember having that thought for…. ever?? Sure not ever, but for YEARS.

Around the same time I started to get that ever-familiar feeling of uncomfort from not moving. I hadn’t cycled for a couple of months, first because the weather was crap, and then because it was too cold to breath if you were on the move. I actually yearned to go for a run. A run!! Gee…

And you know what I did then? I proceeded by not doing anything about it!!

But now. I have decided not to punish myself for not doing nothing then. I am rewarding myself for having thought the thought in the first place, and doing something about it now. Not because it’s a New Year. Because I’ve managed to hold still just enough to breath a bit and realise that the urge to move my butt hasn’t disappeared anywhere.

So on Tuesday this week I rejoined my local gym!! It was actually a great suprise that they had changed the whole management, refurbished the gym, added Power Plates which I love!!! and also changed the membership options so that I was able to join for 6 months instead of for ever. I ended up feeling rather happy, not resentful :)

Also apart from the 2 pints of Ben & Jerry’s that I ‘found’ in my freezer over this week, I have made an effort to only eat at home and only eat something I’ve prepared. No takeaways, no ready meals, no deliveries. It’s only been a few days but I’m doing ok. I have gone out and seen friends and ok I did have one burger with chips but apart from that it’s been good.

Oh, and you know what I did at the gym? I did run. And it took me right back to when I first tried it… and the experience was not much different, I was even using the same audio!! It’s weird how running is such a hurdle for me, and yet I quite fancy being able to do it!

It’s strange really. Whilst I know ‘normal’ people are able to cut back when they feel they’ve overendulged, and it would be nice (!) to know I was able to do the same, yet at the same time… somehow it feels like for me it’s like I’ve managed to swap the headless and fruitless running from myself that I’ve been doing for the past 2 months, to real running.

Maybe there’s something there. Hmmm. No way of knowing for sure – is there ever!!! We’ll have to wait and see.